My small Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary Of Current English defines ‘drastic’ as ‘having a strong or violent effect, very serious’. I have been compelled to look for the word drastic because it has become very important in our national lexicon of late.

It does not mean that as Ghanaians, the use of the word ‘drastic’ is a recent discovery. It has only gained prominence because the then candidate Prof. John Evans Atta-Mills used the word drastic very ‘drastically’ during the last general elections.

Since then, so many things in this country have happened very ‘drastically’. Right from the assumption of the National Democratic Congress (NDC) as the government of the Republic of Ghana, so many “drastic” things began to happen in this country at the national level.

Indeed the word has caught on so much that the last time I was passing through the secondhand goods dealers area at the Takoradi Market Circle (please do not ask me what I was doing at the secondhand goods area, we are in ‘drastic’ moments so anything goes), I heard one of the traders asking his colleague “assei, how are you”, then the other one responded, “charlie, it is too drastic”.

I asked myself, what does this mean? Well, I left and went my somewhere. Then in the evening, at the Blue Kiosk where I go to take my two shots of Egya Appiah to face my fufu, I again heard one of the regular patrons of the place asking the woman who sells the stuff to “ give me two ‘drastic’ tots to check my how far”. From there, I told myself that our people are smart and intelligent in the use of words to meet their circumstances and times.

Now let us look at some of the ‘drastic’ things that have happened in this country since January 7, 2009. First, there was a reduction of fuel prices in this country in fulfillment of a campaign pledge.

However, the reduction was ‘undrastic’ in relation to ‘drastic’ promises made during the campaign, so the impact in terms of benefits to the public was not felt.

A few weeks later, the real ‘drastic’ was felt when fuel prices were ‘drastically’ increased to the chagrin and disappointment of the generality of the people of this country.

A transitional team which was supposed to exchange documentation on government assets and liabilities took so long in this simple process to the point that by the time the team wound up, very ‘drastic’ consumption of tea at very ‘drastic’ cost had occurred.

I am told that during the sitting of the team, any NDC member who happened to pass by the AICC could move into the premises and serve himself or herself with a big cup of ‘serve yourself’ transitional tea. All the person needed to do was give signals of ‘eedzo bordoooooooooo’ and the person can drink ‘drastically’.

Why not? Haven’t they stayed in the wilderness for eight years of draught?

Accidents, particularly road accidents in this country, have been an issue of great concern to the nation particularly in the last few years.

The first three months of 2009 however saw ‘drastic’ increases in road accidents unprecedented in the history of this country. People died so ‘drastically’ that the whole nation began to panic.

We sat on tenterhooks brooding over what the nation had done wrong to merit those ‘drastic’ accidents and deaths. Maybe the NDC government’s solution to the road accidents was to reduce the number of vehicles that ply our roads daily.

A certain taskforce was put in place to ‘drastically’ seize cars which were suspected to belong to the state. In the process, many innocent people were ‘drastically’ embarrassed publicly.

While the seizures were going on, some people in the NBC who did not have any known public official positions in government were ‘drastically’ scrambling for the cars.
Floods have been with us basically on a yearly basis.

Their damage to lives and property are not new. The worst in recent history is what happened last year in the three northern regions and parts of the Western region. Can one describe the floods in Accra, Kumasi and Sekondi-Takoradi this year and the damaging effects on the people as ‘drastic’, in relation to previous floods in these parts in the recent past?

We have also seen ‘drastic’ increases in armed robbery in recent times as compared to the past. The solution to that menace is the ‘drastic’ killing of armed robbers or suspected armed robbers.

Meanwhile, inflation has been rising ‘drastically’, interest rates have gone up in a very ‘drastic’ manner, prices of food and industrial goods are in their ‘drastic’ upward trend. Schools are closing down earlier than scheduled because of the ‘drastic’ cost feeding the students vis-a-vis the finances of of the institutions.

University fees have gone up ‘drastically’ and the next academic year is going to see the gnashing of teeth by parents and guardians whose wards would be offered admission into the public universities. Indeed the private universities have not been spared this ‘drastic’ spiral in fees because of the general price levels and cost of living.

Ei, I nearly forgot the ‘drastic’ consumption of kyinkyiga and the stockpiling of pampers. Why not, when prices are rising ‘drastically’, the most economic means of saving cost is to stock pile if you have the means to so do. After all was it not possible that the man was going to take a second wife?

Taking a second wife means more children, which invariably would require more pampers. So in the man’s assets declaration form, he could named 10 children in anticipation of more in future in addition to those present currently.

Eheee, did the magajia in the house have the benefit of traveling outside the country with soccer and tennis Minister? The world can be ‘drastically’ unfair to some people ooo.

This is the case of apupuoyaa (do not ask me the English name of that smallllll animal that resides by the banks of a river or a stream) which, fables have say, created the stream and yet has been consigned to the banks of the stream while those animals which contributed nothing to the creation of the stream are found in the middle of it.

Country man, have you also noticed the ‘drastic’ increase in the number of photographers in this country ever since the NDC took over power? The amateurs and the professional paparazzi.

The amateurs took their shots in a crowded environment so that when the pictures become unclear they could use the crowded nature of the place as an excuse for the poor shots.

The professional paparazzi had the world of open space, the whole of the world watching him to take his shot. I hear next year, his shot of OMAMA would be used to make calendars. Watch out for your copies.

We indeed live in a world of ‘drasticality’ of everything. In fact everything.


Author: Kwesi Biney/Daily Guide/Ghana